It's Over

Well I am officially divorced. I can't say I'm happy about it. I know I wrote that I didn't want to stay married to him either but I do miss the decent sweet man I was married to before all this mess began. I'm not quite sure what happened to him but he is gone. I guess that's what I'm really sad about the most. He was my best friend and one of my biggest supporters. When I felt like I should give up, he would encourage me. And I would do the same for him. We were always there for each other like a good married couple should be but now that's all gone. I've been putting on this huge brave front but its scary to me that I might spent the rest of my life crying myself to sleep over my lost soul mate. I don't want to spend the rest of my life alone but right now I can't picture ever meeting someone who will make me feel the way my ex husband did. I didn't just give my heart to this man but my soul as well. And now I have to figure out how to move on at this point. I know moving to TN will help me move on with my professional life which is a good thing but how do I move on in my personal life? I know it will take a long time to heal. I would just like to go to bed one night without crying myself to sleep.